My Best Friend is No More my Friend :(

I am in great agony and pain while writing this blog entry. And to be honest I am not sure what to write. I am really hurt with what happened to me this week. 

Someone who was so close to me has decided to desert me. Yes, my best friend has decided that she doesn't want to keep in touch with me and she seemed very clear about what she wants.

She has been my best friend for sometime now. When me first met we connected really well. We became the best of buddies sharing every little thing. She became a part of my life. I enjoyed every moment that I was with her. She use to pamper me a lot. In fact, she ignored a lot of stupid things I did. I felt good that there is someone you can rely upon.

We use to fight a lot. And then I use to make it up to her. Every time we fought the bond between us became stronger. To be honest I started liking her a lot despite of the fact that she has a boyfriend. And everyone took notice of my liking for her. And then I told her how I felt about her and what she means to me. But she was not ready to get into a relationship and she had valid reasons for this. She told me that she cannot be what I want her to be but we can be best friends for a lifetime. I liked her honesty and decided that lets keep it that way only.  But deep inside me the desire for her kept burning. 

And then this happened. She started maintaining her distance from me. I kept asking but she did not replied. For six months this continued. And then one day when I called her up, I was surprised by what she did. My little angel had gone wicked. She said a lot of wicked things to me which I could never imagine she could say. But she kept saying and I kept listening. 

I was surprised to find out that the warmth inside her has suddenly gone. She was really cold and emotionless. The girl I knew was lost. She said she doesn't want to keep in touch. She said I am a very smart man and I play my moves smartly. She even told me that I should not be peeping into her private life.

I asked for reasons, but she has decided to leave me with this burden. I just want to ask her when did I played smart with her and took her advantage. I never lied to her about anything but still had this to say.

My world turned upside down. I was shocked. But I told her that if she doesn't want to keep in touch then let it be like that. My only concern is her happiness and if this makes her happy then let it be like that. And trust me guys, I will not make any attempts to reach out to her again. I just don't want to disturb or bother her anymore.

Some say she used me like the cheapest napkin that one can buy. Some say I was just a 2ND option for her. Some say its her habit to flirt. Some say she is just like that - COLD.

Whatever someone might say, I know what she meant to me. And even today if she needs me for anything I will be available to her. 

Those of you who happen to read this entry, please don't post comments and please don't ask questions. Because, how much I might write, no one can hear the voice inside me. And as sad as I might be, I know life goes on for everyone. And I wish for myself all the luck in the world.